Busting this Divorce - 90 Days NC #3

[HPoirot]

Hello Calibri. Thank you so much for your post on ADs. I very much appreciate that your broke your 180's to tell me about your experience. I've never taken them before too... and I now see how dangerous it can be to really depend on them.

I did not want to use them at all... but I'm in a place now where I'm finding it difficult to turn myself around sometimes. Like Starsky suggested... my goal is to use these temporarily. If, at the end of the month when I visit my doctor again, I'm better then he'll have me stop. I've known my doctor for 20 years and he's very good... taking good care of me.

I hope for the best for you and your's Calibri.

...

Being better more emotionally stable me this morning. Just deciding to do it and acting like it as the TED videos say.

First thing this morning... text from W. She wants to get another rental car and asks for another $300. She said yesterday that she would not be able to get a rental until tomorrow so she wanted me to drive S11 to her office to meet her for lunch. Now she changed and asks me to drive him to our old house.

Two things... she said $150 of the last $300 was to put the rental car "on hold" as she wasn't using a credit card. She should get that $150 back.

Also, instead of $300 she asked for, she took $400 from our joint account last time.

So I responded soon after... "Hello W. I'll transfer $150 to the joint account. You mentioned $150 was for a hold on the last rental so I believe you get that back? Also you transferred an extra $100 from the account with the last $300?"

Tried being nicer by asking questions. Maybe they should have just been statements.

Then I immediately transferred the money. I texted her to let her know and said I would be by the house with S11 at lunch.

Then thought about it and texted her... "Hello W. Since you will have a car today, can you come pick S11 up for lunch? I'm working today. Thanks."

Just now, I heard her call S11 to say good morning. She has yet to reply to me.

Again I hated to do this. I don't want to control her by asking her for the rental receipts b/c I don't trust her. But she continues to do things to destroy trust like taking an extra $100 last time and the $1000 from a few weeks ago from our account.

Part of her problem with me is that I don't work with her... it's always my way and my feelings she says. I feel like I'm making this worse by my handling this morning but I don't know what else to do from here.

Anyway, she responds after a bit that she will come pick him up but an hour earlier. She now wants to keep him until 4 if that's ok with me. She'll also put $100 back into the account tomorrow.

I don't know how we come back from this. If she keeps feeling to has to lie, scream at me, and take my money and I keep having to call her on those things... how do we ever get back to friends?

So I just keep going.