Off of the roller coaster. My ride is done anyway.
Ok C, you need to STFU with this talk. You are NOT dead in the water and your "ride" is only done when you decide its done. Hop off the roller coaster yes, but rise above it, keep that level head. Was it not you that less than a week ago was telling me how much hope and promise there is in your situation? That you should be thankful that you have as much communication with your H as you do because theres not even kids involved? That you and H actually have positive convo's sometimes? You said it yourself, you are NOT the big bad wolf right now, H has identified it is HIMSELF. You need to stand beside him through this, he already knows you're not doing anything wrong. He's just taking it out on you. This is nothing unusual...
Originally Posted By: Calibri
He fully believes that I'm the only one who triggers his anger. But come to find out, he's not talking to anyone, aside from me or his therapist. He hasn't told his parents what's going on other than we're "having communication problems". So of course I'm triggering his anger - because I'm having a conversation with him where he actually has to talk, instead of listen to his mom for 20 minutes talk about herself.
Of course this makes sense. He's not talking to anyone else so who else would trigger his anger? You just said it yourself. So do what you just said and detach more and don't engage. When he's ready to talk, which in one of your recent posts, you let him come to you, you said it was a very positive convo. Not talking to other people is also normal. My W talks to me, her mom and her roommate. Her mom is divorced 4 times and her roommate has the hots for her. So of course theres negative influences all around- this is nothing unusual. You've come up with a plan, just go do it.
Originally Posted By: Calibri
Fully believes that we can never have a relationship again after his behavior for the last three months.
"Believe nothing what they say, and less than 50% of what they do"
Keep your head up C, we both know your and my sitch have a lot of promise. I've been pretty down lately as well with the same attitude of "its done, its over, etc etc" when in reality, we've been going at this for what...3 months? We're better than that. Go read that article you sent me from Maybells thread again. It's a huge pick me up, IMHO. It'll get better, you know it will.
ME: 28 W: 24 M: 2.5yrs T: 5yrs BD: 22 SEP 14 W Leaves: 5 OCT 14
