Bottom line you will need to realize is that you can do nothing to control her. What you'll read in the books is that you can only control YOU. She has given up on the relationship right now and doesn't want to work things out.
It sounds like you have some control issues to deal with. Focus on you for right now and buy the books when you get back. They're pretty similar and DR is the updated version. Both have a lot of valuable insight to help you right now.
Divorce proceedings can be put on hold. It is a legal process and only moves forward if she/you choose to move it forward. If you stop and do a 180 then that will give her room to rethink her decision. You're not going to feel progress immediately, but you WILL begin to see results of you stick with sandis rules. They will be tiny baby steps in her behavior. You will probably NOT see an immediate change of course from her anytime soon. DB can take months, and for some it takes years.
UpperCut Me: 28 W: 25 Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home) S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15) No kids
