Inbetween Land

[Faith2b]

Hello,

Thank you so much for reading.

I have since poured myself into GAL. It has been great...My house has sold so I move into a apartment this week Monday I will start moving things. I have been working with my three children on their emotions. It actually feels good to teach my children about good and bad choices rather than their dad (one thing I realize I was doing wrong).

I actually was able to get him to communicate with me. When I first spoke to him on the phone he did not want to tell me that the girl had moved in with him. When I asked him he kind of broke down and said Monica I cant do this now. So I said ok and we hung up.

Several days later he tried spewing on me.I suggested that I can pick them up and he told me hell no that he would call the police he said he had a restraining order on me this sent me in a upset. I then said Im so over all of this Im done I dont care if I ever see you again or we get back together. I told him that I was fine with this. He later retracted but before he retracted this somewhere in between me losing my head he called me controlling this really hurt my feelings and sent me into a bad mood all the way until the next day which I GAL and felt better. But the whole control thing really hurts because I know this is something that I have done which has been the demise in our relationship


I had called about our daughter who had been having a rough time in school with the transition. I had also sent him an email he felt was disrespectful to the OW new position as gf and this is when he opened up about the other girl. He texted me that "She loves him and he will plan on marrying her too. He did not reciprocate the love comment so I was very happy that he did not say that. I took this convo and called him. He was waiting for me to call. I answered and calmly told him that I would respect their relationship. I told him that this is for now but that I am his wife and will be his only wife ever. Even though we are divorced we had plans to get remarried which we will!!!! To my surprise he said "Well I will think about what you said" that was a great moment for me. I feel that as long as I GAL and work on better conflict management with him things can change. I have to Shut my mouth more and listen to him. Surprisingly Christmas was a success for me I went to a girlfriends house. I knew he would call me because he knows how much I wanted for us all to be a family that day. He called and he started a fight with me about when he would drop them off to me tomorrow. I asked him what time. He started to give me vague answers. I was trying to come up with a solution and he was just not having it. As I had to work and he did too. I let my feelings for the new girl get to me in that he suggested her to watch them. I told him i was not comfortable even though he felt comfortable. He said he would not go into the office. Then I asked him what time then will he bring them back and he said he would discuss this with the ow. I then said that was fine that he would discuss it with her but I needed to know because I needed to make plans as well. (Thought I handled that well)

I suggested that I can pick them up and he told me hell no that he would call the police he said he had a restraining order on me this sent me in a upset. I then said Im so over all of this Im done I dont care if I ever see you again. I told him that I was fine with this. He later retracted but before he retracted this somewhere in between me losing my head he called me controlling this really hurt my feelings and sent me into a bad mood all the way until the next day which I GAL and felt better. But the whole control thing really hurts because I know this is something that I have done which has been the demise in our relationship.

He ended up saying Have a good night and Merry Christmas and I stupidly went on because of the control comment. I tried to explain that I was not being controlling only helpful. Then I said I was not comfortable with the ow and her baby when he was not present. I also commented on the restraining order and how we can just meet at Mcdonalds or somewhere mutual. I told him not to come to my new place. And once again reiterated that I was not trying to be controlling. So he commented its not my house number 1 and number 2 that the kids will be back around noon. Once again he changed the time. My final remarks were in response to his response or lack their of directly answering me.

I said "Number 1 I need to know and Number 2 if you guys are making plans that's fine but I need to make plans as well.

My last remark was the wine I had been drinking,,,I texted "Number 3 your using the kids against me...instead of facing the problems we have AKA control issues both of our problem. Number 4,5,6 Your right, Your right, Your right7, 8, 9, like I told you before number 10 Im your wife!!

Well needless to say I had to call him an hour and a half later no response to all of this. But He was really nice on the phone. He said he fell asleep and that he would get them to me at 4:00 I said well I get off at 3. He basically without words said he would have them their at 4 almost like implying that will give you enough time to settle.

he ended up taking them earlier they got their exactly around 3 he texted me and let me know they were in route. I said ok then he texted me after he dropped them off to let me know they were their. That was yesterday. I wont be calling. When he texts me or calls me still not sure how I will react or what steps to use but I know that I have to be prepared just not sure how yet and he knows I move in on Monday will he offer to help?? Not sure and should I even take the help not sure I ay yes anytime with him is a good thing right?/


Well thanks again