I was doing really well for the last day or so until a few minutes ago.
Found out that a big group of H's friends and their kids are going away for New Year's. No idea if H is going too. He "generously offered" a while back to take D for New Year's this year (he had her last year, too, when they went away with this same group). "I thought you'd like to have New Year's free to go out." Right. He does that a lot- offers something and tries to 'sell' it (he is a salesman, after all), when really it's what he really wants in the first place. There is no altruism.
Anyway, I'm struggling tonight with a couple of things: 1) this group of friends has very clearly chosen him over me. (Maybe they invited him to go along-- he hasn't mentioned his plans, I haven't asked. When I asked a 'friend' tonight who was going, she didn't say H, but that doesn't mean anything.) I know they are in a tough spot. I get it. But the loss of those relationships, and travel partners (more on this in #2) is tough.
2) this group of friends has the means and the interest to travel quite a bit. And there are a bunch of girls near D's age, and they all get along really well. I feel like I am really grasping to find any travel partners whose schedules and budgets align with mine. I want to give my D a fun vacation, but I don't seem to have anyone to go with. And the idea of traveling just me and D seems too difficult and not enough fun for either of us.
I'm not close enough with anyone to be invited on their family vacations. I do not want to take a vacation with my family.
I'm feeling really low and lonely all of the sudden.
