I have to say Job's explanation fits my husband to a T. He was not abused as a child but kind of forgotten. His two older sibs were given a lot more affection and his parents just seemed more interested in them. I did not know this when we married but through the years I have witnessed it time and time again.
In fact the one real regret I have in all this was that I forced him to call Mom and Dad every two weeks for 20 years. I married young and thought this was our obligation. It was always a source of tension but I was determined we would be respectful and call all the parents. Well around four years ago I finally said this is your job and I will quit forcing you to check on your folks. It all started to implode after that. Slowly at first, but looking back it was the first of many triggers. In hindsight I wish I had never forced his relationship with his parents. I will always wonder if he had the opportunity to work through this at 39 years old would we be here now?
Sorry for the hijack but MLC is a real thing. I guess like drug abuse - many of use have a predisposition for addiction but, given the right context, it can happen to anyone.
M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters BD: 5/14 Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW D Final 9/17
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” ― Maya Angelou
