'm absolutely sure she doesn't see him besides work and that she got over the idea of him because she does have the morale to not cheat on me.
You are deceiving yourself. I had super high standards. I was extremely religious. Had judged people who cheated. Yet, I had an A.
Keeping it work related is nothing more than a smoke screen. Every time she sees him, it like she gets a shot of drugs to make her high. Affairs are extremely addictive. She will live for the next fix....which is OM.
How can you be absolutely sure she does not see him outside of work? Let me tell, affair partners can find a way. My H did not know what I was doing either.
Word of warning, you cannot "open up your feelings" to a W that has OM in her head. It only backfires and pushes her away. Opening your feelings is the last thing to do now! She needs to wonder if you are still interested in her. Don't reassure her hoe much you love her. You have to act much like you did when you first met her. I bet you did not open your feelings the first time you met. Be that guy!
Btw, cheaters lie. You cannot believe her. I am sure you won't believe me, but you will find out. I am sorry.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
