I'm glad if it could help you think. Have you read the article "What Shamu taught me about a happy marriage" in the NYT? There's a nice section about the "American husband" that taught me that each person is like an animal with characteristics that can't be changed. A tiger will hunt, a fish will swim.
Originally Posted By: Calibri
Hell, at this point, I'm almost at the point where I believe opening my mouth is controlling.
Same here: it feels like anything I say is critical. I'm paranoid about everything I say and it's exhausting. I imagine it's a step on the path to seeing the difference between criticism and the rest.
Our challenge is to learn these new behaviors, not just fake them until our WAS come back. Otherwise, our WAS are right to be wary of our changes, to see them as controlling device to bring them back and no more.
You're very lucky that your H is engaging so much and even requesting positive interactions. It's the first step to reconciliation, so enjoy it. Re-read DR perhaps to make sure you act well. My advice is only to keep it at that level: fun, simple, etc. for a while.
M39 D6 D3 (at S) S 2014-09 D 2016-09
"You can't start a fire sitting around, crying over a broken heart" - Bruce Springsteen.
