barely holding on - 6

[u-turn]

I kick myself because I cannot stop thinking of what I want. I fight myself against telling her that I still love her and can forgive her. I can put my anger aside.

I mentioned to her that she had nightmares last night - showing her that I care. Still poured her a cup of coffee this morning. These are just things that I do (I have always done). I'm don't know if this makes her think that I'm accepting and ok with her decisions.

Bit of an obsessive and down day so far - again.
Sun's out for a change of pace and not too cold - getting outside - walking that lazy dog.