I'm glad that you are getting some positive feedback from her. I'm sorry I was so harsh, I know that if I did that it would have back fired completely and he would have completely retreated or spewed a bunch of hate in response.
But maybe that is because I am a woman dealing with a man. As a woman I would love it if my H would actually tell me why he doesn't think our marriage is worth saving. When I ask he can't give me a straight answer, talks in circles, if he is feeling kind he says things like "it's not you it's me" sort of arguments, or "we are just so different" but then can't give me examples of what he means by that. Really? After 14 years of marriage you suddenly woke up one day and decided we were so different we needed to divorce?
If he is in a nasty mood he will just throw my vulnerabilities back at me to get me to shut up, or cry, or walk away (which I have a hard time doing). Like saying "I wish you would die" "you're just mad because she's my friend and you aren't" or--before I got my job--"you destroyed this family by not making enough money". All things that he later takes back when I bring it up later claiming he was just mad.
Most of the time he just says, "I feel like I'm in a prison" (because we are all downstairs watching TV) or " I don't know why I feel this way". It is infuriating, but I am learning to not care anymore. It's his issue not mine--and when push comes to shove the reality is that he just doesn't love me anymore. No reason.
Last edited by mustardseed; 12/23/1404:23 AM.
40s 2teens M14Y BD-10/12/13 rec-1/14 BD2-5/14 rec2-9/14 EA disc-10/14 4/15-BD 3 and triangulation ensues Served with D6/15 MS forced to leave7/15 D agreement signed 8/16 final 5/17
