I would suggest a text, but keep it a "group" text. I wouldn't pursue him at all. As long as toots made it clear in the beginning she wated the marriage to work if he was willing then I wouldn't chase.

P

Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction