I really do empathise with living with a compulsive, particularly a drinker. It is one of the hardest sitches to be in and more than most I will encourage you to changes in your life.
Any decision that you make is yours alone, go or stay. Clearly there are pulls in both directions. Either road will be a very hard one. If you intend to leave then I recommend you do so because your M is truly finished, not because you have an alternate. Otherwise you leave H not understanding his full role in the demise of your M, which gives him reason to self pity and continue his compulsive behaviour. In the long run I think this would cause you more pain. Take the high road, park the EA until you are separated.
This site is devoted to M and resolving the issues surrounding your M. If H is unwilling to change his compulsive behaviours then you are in a very difficult position. Indeed alcoholics can behave very erratically indeed, please be very careful for your own safety. There are many here who because they are LBS will be quite harsh on your EA. I am an almost WAW with a seriously compulsive H and I understand the needs to move on and out. Do this devotee because your M is ready to move to S then D, and not because you have an EA, no matter how attractive that may seem to you. If you truly want to move on and find new love, then do so with pride and dignity and not with attraction to OM leading you.
I do believe I understand a little of your position, in many ways they are similar, both with compulsives and drinkers who dropped the bomb on us from high. Yours is saying he wants to piece, what is he prepared to do for that? It must be to give up his compulsions including alcohol and EA. You are in my prayers.
Take great care Vanilla
Last edited by Vanilla; 12/22/1407:06 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
