Keep the focus on you and your family. How can he meet your needs when he can't even figure out what he's doing or needs himself? They are so self absorbed during the crisis and until he faces his issues and grows up, he will not be the man you expect him to be, i.e., husband, father, friend, etc.
I'm glad to see he's willing to have friends over to play cards. Listen and observe all that goes on this evening, if they come over. You should be able to tell if he's just going thru the motions or really is enjoying himself.
It's a bit of the distance/pursuit game, i.e., you distance and he comes closer. Keep your expectations low or none. He's not out of the woods yet.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
