KGirl - one year later

[KGirl]

Just got back. It was.. a dinner? And that's about it, I guess. But I'm ok. I'm not really sad, not crying, it wasn't anything in either direction.

We were at the restaurant for about two hours... just talked about a bunch of random things (friends, changes in our work, family, things we've been up to, etc.) I talked about some trips I've been on, some arts and crafts classes/projects I've been doing, etc. Besides work, apparently the main thing he's done is spend a ton of time with some game on his phone (whichever one Kate Upton is in the commercials for). He talked for like 15 min. about the game and showed me it on his phone... and told me he spent over $200 on it in less than a month. That is a LOT of money for what he makes. It kind of demonstrated that he's not ready to grow up yet. He apparently played it so much at Thanksgiving that his mom yelled at him for being on his phone all day and not spending time with family. So I felt like I made a good showing of my efforts to get out there and GAL. Him, not so much.

We had one business thing to talk about - I changed my address w/ USPS, but it's hard to say what they decide to do when there's mail addressed to BOTH of us, and they ended up actually forwarding our property tax bill to me instead. I gave it to him and asked him to let me know if there was a shortage from the escrow and I'd send him a check for the difference. He was kind of upset that it went to me.. but what am I supposed to do? Not much of a choice in the matter. He then said "I guess this is why it's important to get your name off of things."

We went out to our cars, and he said "So I was planning on filing the paperwork tomorrow morning, but work is kind of busy, so I don't know." Proceeded to say some things about how he didn't want to lead me on because there is a point one percent [0.1%] chance that he'd change his mind but figured it wouldn't hurt anything to go do dinner so that's why he agreed. And that this was all really hard, but he still didn't think anything would change from what he was unhappy about before. I made a joke from his favorite movie, Dumb and Dumber, and said the line " So you're telling me there's a chance?" (Jim Carrey says that after some girl tells him there's like a one in a million chance she'd go out with him). He said "well I guess but it's very very small."

So his comment about maybe filing the paperwork tomorrow seemed to say he's doing it but doesn't know when. Then as we're walking he said "I don't know, I might wait until I talk to my counselor in January. I'll let you know when or if I file." ??? Now it's an "if"? He sounds confused. He said he's had doubts this whole time but has been working hard to overcome those doubts so he can be confident in his decision, rather than looking into those doubts. Bleh. But you know what, I think that's it. That's enough from me at this point. I told him I wasn't going to reach out again, and to just let me know when he turns it in. We hugged and went to our cars.

So, meh, I dunno. Do I miss him? Yeah, I do. But I wasn't super impressed with some of what he said (between the phone game thing and then he said something about liking to watch "So You Think You Can Dance" and how there are cute girls on there.. hello, you are saying this TO MY FACE?) I don't know that anything's changed, but I looked good, I think I was my best self, and maybe that will leave him something to think about. Maybe it will percolate in his brain for awhile. But he's just really not worth my time and energy given what's up with him right now. I'm just still astonished about this f-ing phone game!! He sure better have the money to pay me for my part of the house, then. Maybe that is a part of me that is not going to change but I don't think I'm crazy for thinking it's unreasonable to be spending so much money on a video game... and he said he's going to keep buying stuff for it because it's worth it (because it "speeds up the game"). Maybe this is why women often date older men instead of ones that are the same age? ; )