W rang me at work to tell me to chase my solicitors and to ask for their details so she could ring them as it was now holding up her house purchase. (i have already provided the same details 3 times)
I asked for her solicitors details which she was yet to provide despite repeated requests. anyway i held my ground a little and she sent through the details at last. I didnt refuse to send mine but i was insistent on her sending hers.
I explained that i had done all i needed to do and it was all waiting on paperwork from her. she seemed to accept this and blamed the solicitors. I feel i was courteous but solid throughout.
Anyway it seems she will be moving out just after christmas at which point we will both be broke and she can fully enjoy her new relationship in the comfort of her new home.
I was upset after this and so texted a work friend who knows what is happening and we went for coffee. she has been a great comfort and help to me. She invited me to join their work christmas do as someone had dropped out and i decided that although i planned to go ceroc dancing this would be an equally good bit of GAL so went
It was nice, though my mind was stuck on my wife and the fact that after her works christmas do she went back to a hotel with OM1. at one point i got upset and had to go outside for some air before i broke down in tears in front of 30 people from work. I felt like just going home.
after a few minutes my friend came and found me and gave me a hug. she said she was worried about me but would understand if i went home at that point. I decided that if i left she would worry more and so i stayed, but instead of moping i made an effort to engage with people and by the time i left i felt better and much calmer.
on the way home i was thinking more and more about whether i should file. I'm not prepared to live in an open marriage and equally i'm deeply concerned about what my wife will do once she moves out. I realised that she has either left me for another man and is lying about it (on top of a load of other lies) or she has been very dishonest with me over a much longer period of time. either way not someone to put a lot of trust in.
So I've asked my solictor a bunch of questions about filing on the grounds of adultery (basically pursuing a fault divorce) and if they come back as i think, then I will likely tell them them to get ready to file and i will think about it more over the weekend. I said a few posts back about the pros and cons of this but actually in the scheme of things the cons pale compared to the other issues any reconcilliation would have to overcome.
I hate this and I hate what it means for me, my kids and the time we will spend together. At somepoint though i have to stand up for myself.
Both mid 30s, 2 young kids BD 7sep14 XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1 D paperwork in progress
