Betsey, you and your family have been on my mind. I am sure you are exhausted in every way, and I hope you get some relaxing time with your daughters while they are out of school.
Originally Posted By: Underdog
I'm so proud of you for getting here so quickly, rpp.
Thanks for saying that. In some ways, I feel like accepting H's apartment is admitting I don't care where he lives. But.....right now I don't. I'm content with things just the way they are at the moment.
Today I talked on the phone to a friend of mine, we used to be really close when our older kids were all little and we did a lot of things as families and as couples. But as the kids got older I hadn't seen her as much. I told her H and I were S, she didn't know. Her response was interesting. She said that she had always thought of me as very independent, that she wasn't sure who had left who, that she wasn't really surprised, and she asked if anything was really all that different. I found her response intriguing. It painted me in a more powerful light than I had been seeing myself.
Originally Posted By: Underdog
She was diagnosed at a young age with juvenile diabetes,.
My D16 was diagnosed with T1D (juvenile diabetes) a few days after she turned 8. I am in fact terrified of her going to college. But she's been a big lesson in I can't change circumstances, I can't change people. At diagnosis, I would have traded places with my child in a heartbeat, taken the disease on myself in exchange for her health. But I couldn't. I had to learn to manage what had been dealt us. Big lesson in the "what is".
Originally Posted By: Underdog
You seem so much more at peace with the person you want to be. That giving heart you have is filled with love, so it holds no place for anger. Personally, rpp, I'm positive that you are one of the people here who are successes just because you are following your own path, by your design. .
Keep going, rpp. You're really cooking on gas right now.
I do feel at peace with who I am and who I want to be. I feel free now to find out who that RPP is, I felt like my M didn't allow her to be herself. I'm not blaming H for that, I own up to shoving myself aside. And it won't happen again.
