Supposedly the 5 acres next to me was logged for a significant amount of money, but its a level parcel and they left it a mess. Amounts vary wildly, but worst case scenario, I should get a nice view in exchange for the timber value.
I'm in a weird place this week. I know I have a long ways to go in terms of healing and growing, but I think I've finally stopped with the "I can't believe this has happened" and "I can't believe STBX has done this" and have maybe moved on to fully dealing with what is. I still think a traditional family would be the best for my daughters, but I guess I'm starting to really accept that I personally will be ok. I loved my husband, and I really do believe he's a good man, although his actions now are troubling. He will be in my life forever due to the children we share, and I genuinely hope we can come to some positive place.
I know that several posters on threads I read regularly wonder if they will find love again. Sometimes I think there must be something wrong with me because I don't worry or wonder about that at all. Maybe I'm still too close to it all.
I have been spending more thought on some of the dreams I feel I have had to give up due to all of this. Because of the increases in our income we projected over the years, I expected to be able to travel fairly extensively with our daughters and I confess to having a dream of being able to cut back my work hours to 30 a week for a few years (3 or 4) to be able to participate a bit more in the girl's childhood activities. At first I felt that I would have to let these things go - there's just no way without two full incomes coming in - and it was one of the things that made me a little sad, but I've been looking at it lately and you know what? I just need to figure it out. I'm already in process towards getting a work from home job that should give me a lot more schedule flexibility - not the same thing as reduced hours - but close to the same effect. And for the travel? There's always a way. Maybe income from renting out the apartment - maybe I figure out a second income stream or maybe I just get a lot more aggressive career wise. I'm not giving up on that one.
