I dunno, pretend your Clint Eastwood -- cool, self-confident, in control. ;-) She either gets on the Shodan train or she doesn't. Either way, you'll be OK. I think she might be more attracted to that than someone who's whole world revolves around HER.
Don't hang on her every word or NEED her assurances and affection now. That's kind of weak and unattractive.
Talk to your counselor, ALONE, about how and when to address the elephant in the room (the affair she's denying).
If not Client Eastwood, some other character you admire who id strong, solid, centered and DANGEROUS.
Be the true Karaetka -- open-hearted, without malice, but not safe. Be like Aslan in Naria -- good but NOT SAFE.
