As always, thank you for the advice and for the response, Vanilla. You have been a great help in this time.
Journaling: Today is a tough one. I suffered an injury working out (I'm guessing a strained hip flexor) and now I can barely walk. Very difficult to keep up with the little one?.......
I will have to rest up for a week or so, I imagine. Tried to explain to W that I may need to go to a doctor. She responds that "well, you have insurance, so you can make an appointment." Makes me feel so needy. I only have insurance through her job right now. Makes me feel like she's just taking pity on me and not divorcing me so I don't lose insurance. I feel worthless. No wonder she left. I can't even support myself.
Explained that I may need more help with the baby than I thought (recall we discussed her taking him for more days than usual this week because finals are coming up). She seemed very annoyed at this request. I told her I don't want her to be mad at me because of it (I know, I should've stfu), she said she wasn't. I probably came off as needy and I'm sure she resents me for asking for so much help. Ungh.
I don't know what to do. I'm in a lot of physical pain and the stress of school is driving me crazy. I don't want to ask for any more help from her but I just need someone to help me, just for a tiny bit. Is that so much to ask? I'm not asking so that I can go out and party (like she is). I'm asking so that I can get things done and so that I can heal from injury.
Ins, these things happen at the worst of times, sometimes for the best of reasons, to help us dig deeper.
Stop the pity party please and let's start the practical party. Firstly, W married YOU and you are a student. So far logical. There is a baby, which you take care of. W has insurance and as a family it extends to you. You are in pain and injured, go get this seen to immediately before there is damage. Frankly who knows or cares what W thinks, you and the little one matter more than any random thought of Ws. You want to continue to look after the little one? Then go get doctoring. Read my sitch, none of H views on my health bothers me. Pain does though!
In any case, it's in her best interest to have you up and running again (pun intended) as then you can help with the little one. Go get pain relief without any delay.
When you have ceased being a student then no doubt you will be working and having insurance of your own. Go do it, no hestitation, you have studies and a baby.
Is there a student union or bursary? Chat to a tutor and see if short term crèche can be arranged whilst you do finals, any other young parents that you can do a swap with, you get relief during finals and then you cover another time. You may be looking for a student in the next semester whose finals don't overlap. There will be a solution.
Discuss your sitch with your tutor, there may be resources of which you are unaware or there may be auxiliary which will help.
This is one time when you really don't STFU, this isn't about R it's about your future and that of you little one. Your long term future.
Conversation "W, for the next few weeks whilst I study for my finals I would like....... This is about my future and my long term ability to provide and care for our child. Can you please (help me pay for a crèche, baby minder, or provide relief cover yourself) on x And y dates as I need to study for my finals"
Time for action Ins, get studying for those finals, we need some celebration drinks. This is tough but it's possible. As a young dad then you need all the help and support you can get, ask for it!
Let us know, we are with you Vanilla
Last edited by Vanilla; 12/15/1404:23 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
