I appreciate your response and do not feel called out, but I did definitely want to understand better. It is amazing that I have never realized my co-dependency until now. It looks like I have another goal to add to the list and that's breaking the toxic patterns.
One of the biggest problems in our R was my lack of self worth. I put my happiness completely in H's hands, which I see now is not only an impossible burdern to place on someone, but a guarantee for failure.
I have been doing well with NC and trying hard to lovingly detach. A few one 180's that I've been doing : - having a PMA. I was always a negative person - staying calm. Not raising my voice during arguments or getting upset - taking accountability. Admitting mistakes - exercising consistently - working around the house on tasks I wouldn't normally do - making dinner every night - changing up my look
What 180s have worked for you?
Me 26 ; H 26 S 8 Married less than a year Bomb 9/15/14 H moves out 9/15/14 H Files 11/21/14 Served D papers 12/31/14
