Angry WAH blames me for everything.......

[hope224]

I've been reading your past and my situation is quite similar. H has depression and anxiety,he pretty much had a meltdown after BD. Everything you have described, i went through. His anxiety skyrocketed when our family came to visit us in June. I had no idea he had these mental diseases and he basically denies it or rather he knows he had it but doesnt want to see the doctor. We are only staying married till summer, 2015 . Recently, he keeps wanting to see baby and I more often. I mean I understand seeing the baby but why me? He tries to get us to visit him [since I'm living with a friend]. Somedays, he tells me that he is confused about this and cats about me but other days tells me that his decision on D has not changed. But, he would get mean and angry with me when we were going back home, later he opens up and tells me that the reason is because he hates being alone all week [his choice anyway]. So bottom line, I actually feel way better than I did a few months ago. U jane nor really been doing GAL because I'm pretty much just working and spending time with baby. I do get out and about visiting friends though. I have not dropped the rope yet. I've been telling h to get help since both his parents have depression and anxiety but he is a stubborn donkey.
I just keep praying and hoping he realizes I'm not the problem. But, if he decides to go ahead with the D, i just hope he will be happy. It's really hard not to blame myself for this mess. I have constant heartaches but I'm also letting him cut the cake and have it too because I go out of my way to stay worth him during the weekend. But, it's getting tiring and i feel stronger most of the time now. The only reason I'm letting him do this is because I fear he is sucidal 30% and I'm the only one he talks to about his feelings. I've told him to talk to professionals but he absolutely refuses. My friends and family tell me to let him be and i should not take that kind of pressure but i can heal, he can't eight now.

I'll keep reading your post.