a young marriage in trouble

[lnlyshp]

Today, I went to the gym with my son and dropped him off at the day care. They must have left a name tag on him because when my wife came to pick him up after work, she found it on his jacket.

"Where'd you guys go?" she asks.

"A place." I say, as I smile my secret smile, the one like I have a secret nobody in the world knows.

"Tell me!" she says, not unkindly.

"The gym," I explain, "He had fun at the daycare with the other kids."

We joke for a little while about him. I know she was mostly asking because of him, but it was nice to see her showing interest in what he and I were up to.

She watches him for the afternoon and I'm to pick him up around bed time. I text and ask if it's okay if I pick him up late, because I need to finish my paper. When I arrive, she asks if I finished my paper (I hadn't). I joke with her because I never finish my college work on time, which she knows. "I was just asking, butthead!" she says with a smile.

"Goodnight," I say after she loads the baby into my car and I turn to get in my seat. "Goodnight," she replies.

I see a glimmer in her eyes when she looks at me sometimes. I don't know what it means, but it's nice to see her smile around me. It's nice to know that she doesn't hate me, at least. I don't consider conversations like this baby steps, because they're still just about our son and nothing to do with reconciliation or the R. I just...love that girl. I want those smiles in my life, no matter what. Detaching is hard, especially when I think about like I am tonight, but I like it when things are pleasant between us.

*Sigh* sorry for the novel, everyone. I'm hopeless!