Jefe - Climbing out of the mire - #8

[Jefe]

Interesting. The wife took time out of her day to drive over here and bring me a birthday card.

I had assumed your wife might be the breadwinner because I don't remember you posting about work. Do you work full time?

I have been self employed for the last 16 months. The business was supposed to be a "we" thing and my wife even cut back on her hours in late June to jump into the business which never really manifested itself. In the first month or so of the of the separation she was 100% engaged in the family and I really thought we'd be back together by mid Sept. She would help with the girls anytime I needed her to so I could work. By the end of Sept she she had completely abandoned the kids meaning I needed to squeeze my jobs in between 8:30-3:30 so I could pick up the girls. Before the S I had more work than I knew what to do with and the business was growing well. Since, I do enough to keep us clothed, fed and other basics. The time factor along with my PMA and other factors have really eaten into my earning ability. Not to mention my heart is just not in it anymore. So trying to find a full time gig that works around family, again.

Soooooooooooooo, how do you spend your day? What is your routine?
When my H was living with OW I kept myself so busy as soon as the kids went to bed I crashed too (I was also pregnant with 4 kids so tired anyway) but my point is I was go go go every second so that 1.) I didn't think about H as much 2.) Could sleep at night.

5:30AM Up and get myself ready, load the truck, get lunches made and kids fed & ready and out the door by 7. Their school is a charter school so it's about 30 minutes away then we have to wait in line for drop off another 10-15 minutes.
Then I work during the middle
3:30ish I need to be at the school, in line to pick them up.
4:30 we are home, snacks made, clothes changed, unwind. 1 hour of TV for the girls invoice and computer time for dad.
5:30-7:00 is homework, prepare dinner, eat. (We eat at the table as a family) etc.
7:00-8:00 is snuggle time or game time, or bath time or a combination of all 3.
Girls in bed no later than 8:30.
9:00 - I drop - Clean the house, do laundry, do dishes, clean out truck/trailer, check in on Grandmother and tend to her needs, practice for up-coming worship schedule, etc, etc.

Boring and not much GAL.

I KNOW just chillin with the kids will make your mind go directly to your wife. The kids remind you of the family that doesn't exist right now. This is the hardest thing for me NOW. You need something besides the kids to occupy the space between your ears.

Yes! They remind me indirectly and directly. My 5 year old asks every day, "What time is mommy coming home?" We've explained it to her and she asks every day.

This just scratched the surface and doesn't cover all of your post, but it's what I got right now.