Married young, W had affair w/ coworker Pt.2

[UpperCu]

UC,

Wonka, please teach me how to think like you.

Not sure about that as I am a woman and you're a man....not sure if I can teach a caveman how to think like me.

All kidding aside....

I'm feeling validated by your simple comment right now.

It wasn't hard at all because I HAVE BEEN exactly where you are right now and I do remember that feeling all too well. It wasn't how I think, but how I felt in the first stages when Ms. Wonka left. Not the most pleasant feeling in the world for sure. shudder

In my case, I was away at my office all day when Ms. Wonka and presumably her family & the OW packed up the furniture at our marital home. No way in hell was I gonna hang around and see that unfold.

After I arrived back home at the end of my workday, I was greeted by my late beloved dog and I crashed into the bed wracked with sobs after walking through an almost half empty home.

Never want to live through that kind of trauma again.

Thanks for the insight Wonka. It couldn't have come at a better time. I see that W, my family, and my friends really cannot understand my side of things. They haven't gone through betrayal and pain like this before.

I fell asleep last night and W started texting me again. Here is our convo which picks up after I told her I would reconsider moving her things out before she is ready:

H, I just need consistency. A lot is changing, I'm doing the best I can do. I'm getting ready to leave, I'm packing, finding a car, finding a place to live, and the last thing I need is to move my stuff... Twice. So tell me what you need me to do. I thought we had agreed on something, but it appears that you had something else in mind...

You have a lot of big stuff going on. Sorry for not being sensitive to all of that

No problem. I get that you have your own life to deal with. I just really need some some follow through right now as I figure some stuff out. Do I need to come get all my stuff?

What's on your mind?

A lot. Everything is okay, as much as it can be right now, but I just really wasn't planning on moving my stuff until I had a place to move into in January.

If you're open to talking more about what's on your mind, I am open to listen. I care about how you feel W

I know you do H. And it's really cool that you are so compassionate right now, but I have to not rely on you for emotional support. It's hard enough moving on as it is... Ya know?

What I really need from you is your word. When we agree on something, I need you to be able to stand by it. If that's something you can't agree to right now. I understand. Just tell me what I need to do so I don't have to worry about it while I'm gone...

I leave this Sunday.

I get that it feels like nothing is stable right now. I'm looking for the rock bottom of all this too

Your things are okay as is, I see this is a tough time for you right now. I guess it really wasn't even worth mentioning. Let me know if you still need to stop by to grab anything before leaving Sunday

Ok, thank you. That helps a lot. Everything okay with you?

There are ups and downs. I'm glad to have such a good network of friends here

Yeah... I hear you on that. I'm so sorry for causing you pain...

Thanks W. That means a lot

Of course. I know we will both be okay... But it doesn't make it any easier right now.

Yup. It's certainly not as simple as it seems from the outside tho. There were years of rough roads leading up to this.

I can't imagine how difficult all this is for you right now. We are experiencing much different things.