Ok, so, I am just going to write and hope it makes some kind of sense.
First of all, um...no to the finding his stuff. Sorry, I dont care if he has an issue with being ignored or whatever. It aint your job. You are not his mother. He loses his stuff...not your problem..
I am thinking that your daughter knows what's up. I wouldnt worry too much right now about whether he is giving her false hope, but keep an eye on it.
SS, I hate to say this to you but you are still early into this. Its a process. It takes as long as it does for you to get to where you need to be.
You are still really in his head. Looking at the things he says and does and trying to figure out what they mean is making you crazy.
The trick is not to get ahead of yourself regarding all of this. No need to worry now whether or not you will get a restored marriage. What is supposed to happen will. I really believe that.
I also believe that you have to start living your life for you and your daughter. You have to stop worrying about what he thinks and stop apologizing to him.
Leave him to figure his stuff out. Control the controllables. Leave the rest go.
You will not always feel as you do now. You need to move towards peace...within yourself.
You get there by forgiving yourself for anything that you did or didnt do in the marriage.
You set boundaries and stick to them without worry about what he thinks. They are for you. You have a right to them.
He made choices. He has to live with the natural consequences of them.
As far as limbo goes...I know it [censored]. Remember to accept what is, with the understanding it wont always be like this.
Do not allow his actions and words to affect yours.
