Need help. Jefe wants to change himself. Pt 7

[Jefe]

I understand where you are coming from, and you are probably correct. I am so emotionally charged right now that it is wise that I do nothing and that's the counsel I am getting from my sponsor. He is agreeing that we need to move that direction but slowly and "for a time" whatever that means exactly.

She's not the "bread winner". She is finally making some money for the first time since we got married. She keeps and spends her money as "her" money and I have no direct access to it. She continues to expect that my money is and will be spent as "our" money.

She has started making her car payment. We took on another loan to replace the transmission in the car 3 weeks after we separated that she couldn't possibly afford right now and is still expecting that I pay for all of her gas. She is wanting some "living" cash this week but she can't or won't account for $450 missing from her paycheck a little over a week ago.

It is damned apparent after yesterday that the only person in this equation she is concerned about is her. Not me, not the kids, not our direct family, not even her own family.

So, I think this needs to happen, but it needs to happen correctly. If she wants to be a free and single woman and join the penis of the month club then she needs to put her big girl panties on and be responsible for that lifestyle and the financial, physical, and emotional consequences of it. I'm just too attached to deal with it right now.

All I can say is, I'm sorry, I wish I could follow this damn program better than I am. I suck at this.