I'm so sorry for your loss and for the current situation with your H. It sounds as though he is unable to face either your grief or his own at the moment.....he is using an affair as a means to avoid having to do this.
I can completely understand your anger. He isn't there for you at this point in time, so you need to be there for yourself and look after you as best you can during this difficult time. Know that things ultimately will improve and that you will find happiness again after this great pain. This is within your gift whatever your H or anyone else may do....but it isn't an easy path you are on. We all understand here.
Things sound very uncertain at the moment, and please try not to worry about the longer term at this point in time. Just focus on getting through today and this week etc.
It may not be that you lose your grandchildren as you fear. Your SS and his W may well be keen to stay in touch, and you could let them know that you would like to do this.
Are you seeing a grief counsellor yourself? It may well help if you haven't accessed this support yet. How are you eating and sleeping? Have you seen your doctor for support?
Please post here and rant as much as you want, and know that people here will listen and support.
My sincere condolences and best wishes to you....Toots :-)
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
