Mindsin - Part 7 (Dark times)

[Georgia Bulldogs]

I commend you for confessing your past infidelities and the extent they went physical. If anything, you are in a better position today to actual recover your marriage than you were before when you were still lying to her.

Sure she has every rationalization and justification to divorce you now. Your previous cheating (and cover up) gives her near complete grounds to overwrite all her wrongs.

However, the fear that coming back to the marriage meant you being able to forever punish her and be the victim of her adulterous abuse has left the building.

Don't sweat all that other stuff. Plenty of marriages have come back from the I never loved you, you gross me out and embarrass me and OM is better in bed than you stuff way wards always spew in defense of their abusive choices.

The road to recovery is through conflict. At least she's engaged and still fighting and talking to you. It's still a relationship and "relationships" can be rebuilt. If anything your prior experience as a lying cheater gives you the ability to actually emphasize with what she is experiencing. Like you....she felt entitled to do what she did and did it out of selfishness. Now that she knows you cheated first...she feels double entitled to do what she did to you.

You were both still wrong...but you can still recover from that.

I know you think and feel this is rock bottom and it is. But hope is a powerful thing and if YOU can change your mindset and own what you did in as best a way as possible and not as some crocodile tears manipulative method to get her back...maybe you can lead the way to BOTH TOGETHER becoming better persons and an example to other married struggling persons.

Congratulations on taking the first HONEST step. That took courage.