I definitely see a lot of positives that you pointed out.
From my experience, you have to let them do what they think is right. They don't know what they want. They just seem to know that they are hurting and something triggered it off. They will grab at everything to keep the pain fresh in our mind regardless of how small and insignificant it seems to be. They focus on negative which helps them stay away from us and not too much on the positives.
I'm gonna say that it's great she commented about seeing you more often but I'm also gonna tell you that I wouldn't count on it-UNLESS she truly meant it. I agree w/what UD said about the NO, NEVER attitude and here they are still questioning themselves and this sitch.
My H has kept his distance from me for a long time in regards to being w/me. It's exactly what has been said. They can't stand the pain, guilt, etc when they are w/us. And heaven forbid if you want to talk R! That makes it all the more reason for them not to see you. My advice is wait and see. If she is genuine she'll let you know. If not, give it time and if things are still moving along well, then ask her to lunch or something different in a month or 2.
One quick thing you may be able to do could be to stop by her shop? Maybe stop in and see how things are going-even for a few minutes. Take her a coffee or something and tell her she's always saying how busy she is so you though she could use a 5-10 min break and would give her a refresher and then leave. It will leave you feeling good and possibly her questioning. Might work, might not but if you do it just because, then she should be more tempted to see you again coz you're not putting the pressure on.
I know you want to see her but she can't right now and it stinks but that's how they are. They are only thinking of themselves. Selfish as it is, may be better in the end when you've given her this space and she realizes what kind of H you really are and how you've changed. Well my 2 cents. Gotta run. You've done well. Tootles..........
