Wife having emotional affair part 4

[3kids]

PM thank you!

1- I only persued when she showed signs of maybe working it out. My mistake.
2- I don't call or text unless about kids. I did yesterday because I wanted to see if she wanted both support checks at once for Christmas. I was thinking of the kids. I slipped and said that Christmas was defentaly going to be different and she agreed.
3- I don't
4- I don't she comes to me.
5- I failed the month of November because she showed signs of maybe working on us.
6- never do
7- a little last month but other wise never
8- I don't
9- I did when she asked me and I should have let her come to me. I did in the couple of months prior and it showed in her actions.
10- I don't
11- I never have since the start
12- I was for August, September, and October. November was terrible. I have to get back to that.
13- I am again. November when OM came back in I didn't.
14- I am busy and I do. But have bad days.
15- she always starts now.
16- I never ask about her. She always asks me.
17- I did until November. Back on track now.
18- I control my emotions around her pretty well.
19- slipped twice on this when OM came back in the picture.
20- she leads all talk on this.
21- she did once in November when we where splitting Christmas stuff. Very emotional night. Sucked for both of us. Wish that on no one with kids. We both said sorry.
22- I don't
23- I did in one sentence in November. She was talking how OM is not who she wanted to be with and stuff and I said then why would you continue with him. And she said you don't understand.
24- I try, I don't make contact until she does.
25- I validate the best I can. She has even made comments on this how thank you for careing and listening even thought I don't have to.
26- when around her I do on this forum I don't.
27- I try
28- I do
29- consistant on most
30- I did when she showed signs. My mistake.
31- I don't
32- I try not to
33- I try not to
34- I don't
35- I haven't
36- I do
37- again November was terrible

The tuff part about my detaching is that there is two hard spots for me. For one I was the one who had it his way or the high way. So if I really act like that it's not changing me. The second is that I was not there for her emotionally. I didn't listen I didn't talk. I was more of just do it this way and get over it. So it's hard for me to draw the line sometimes. You are right about reaching out, I messed up there. She sucked me back in with showing some signs of working out. And I feel hook line and sinker. I got to pushy about asking to do stuff and messed up. It was just the first time she had said anything about MC since she paused the divorce back in July. When she shows signs of maybe working, I get all excited and forget everything. I just see one thing, the thing I wanted this hole time. Just a shot at our marriage. Control and every thing else go right out the window. I showed to much and it probably hurt me.

Thank you for your replys if there's more I can work on let me know please!