I am glad you're putting it all out here so we can help you navigate through this minefield.
First thing you will need to do is find out from your L about dropping your RO against your W. That is the most important step. From there, we can figure out how to keep the communications flow with MIL as the gatekeeper.
You ask a good question:
Originally Posted By: vertex
Does DB advise against writing letters to a WAW if the WAW walked away due to abuse and emotional affairs from her H?
It is not just specific to abuse or emotional affairs. Globally speaking, DB discourages letters to the WAS because it is a form of pressure and pursuit. Especially if one takes into abuse into account. For the time being, it is vital and imperative that you show respect for W's need to be apart from you.
It will take a long time for her walls to come down. Use the gift of time to work on YOU and your issues. Please use the time wisely.
