hjoseph, you came here to find out what to do. Here's what you do: focus on you. Quit chasing her, quit trying to talk to her about the M, quit trying to convince her you've changed. Quit clinging. Let her go work out her own issues. Focus on yours.
You have listed some things you needed to work on, and it seems you have a good start on addressing them. Keep it up. Are there other things you need to work on? What would your W say that the issues in the M were?
What are you doing to get out and get a life (GAL)? Read DB and DR. Read them again.
You have seen that pushing doesn't work. It's time to try a different way. Give her the space she wants. Focus on you.
