Your mother has the alanon disease - just cause she doesn't drink doesn't mean she is sober.
I agree with you. Don't worry about the retirement money. Just cut the cord so you can focus on your new wonderful life.
I didn't fight as hard as I could for some money I could have gotten. But like you I know that type of stuff overwhelms and rattles me. I lost out on about 40,000. But it wasn't worth it for my mental health.
There is nothing wrong with just taking the child support and moving on.
You can't continued to be distracted by his bs.
---- M 39 H 35 D5,D4 M 4 T 9 ILYBNILWY 5/18/11 Left 7/11/11 Divorced 12/1/13