Quote: I figure at 54, if we separate I'll probably be alone, but I think it's better than feeling alone when you're with your spouse.
First, I think 54 is young. I'm 48, my NDW is 50, and I expect to be sexually active for at least another 20 or 30 years (maybe not with LDW, tho). I also agree with you that I'm concluding being TRULY alone would be preferable to being "alone with mate". At least then I could deal with my own issues, do what I want when I want, and not have to worry about her issues as well. I also think you should realize that the sitch for older divorcees is bound to be improving, just because more of us are living longer and healthier. I do remember reading that older single women outnumber older single men by a wide margin, tho, so I could be all wet, but then find someone younger! Check out the "Older women" mags in stores - it's cool for younger men to like older ladies these days - nowhere near as frowned upon as in yesteryear.
Then she said:
Quote: If there is anyone out there who has solved this problem without just killing off their own sex drive, I'd like to hear from them. TO YOU MEN, IT'S HARDER BEING AN HD WOMAN WITH AN LD MAN BECAUSE SOCIETY DOESN'T ACCEPT THAT. My girlfriends are always talking about how much sex their husbands always want, and I just sit there smiling but crying inside. HOW DO I KNOW I'M NOT JUST A COVER AND MY HUSBAND IS GAY INSTEAD OF LD.
I really feel for you, but it's not really any easier for me, when I'm with a group of people who are joking about their SL, and not having one myself. As for your last question, I think you'll have to explore that one yourself. Has H ever shown any interest in men? Conversely, has he NEVER shown any interest in women in general? I wouldn't necessarily conclude he's gay, he just may be so LD as to be virtually ND, and especially as he ages, he may decide he's more comfortable without sex, which means you'll have a "hard" (sorry) decision to make.
