Begin Vent: When will my H learn to look at the shared family calendar that the rest of us have been using for years on end? What about "D16 mid-terms" indicates that would be a good time to book a Dr. appointment? And what about the meeting I have booked indicates that I can take her? I thought I was doing a good job letting him make the appointment. I should have done it myself. End vent.
He can make the call to re-schedule it. And he can make if for a time that it's convenient for him to take her.
Ha -- It's things like this (which I also deal with constantly with my STBX) that make me happy thinking I will no longer be legally tethered to his stupidity. It's too bad it affects the kids, but they will all just have to learn through the experience.
M: 43 H: 39 D: 14 Married 15 Together 16 BD: 6/2014 S: 8/2014 OW revealed 10/2014 Instigated dissolution 12/2014, in progress So over it!
Ha -- It's things like this (which I also deal with constantly with my STBX) that make me happy thinking I will no longer be legally tethered to his stupidity. It's too bad it affects the kids, but they will all just have to learn through the experience.
My H can very expertly juggle his own business schedule. He just won't look at what his kids are doing. Because if it's convenient for him...... All that's coming to an end. I'm looking for ways to give him more responsibility for the kids, and this is a start. I should have done it years ago, I thought I was being a good wife by handling routine things freeing him up to make a living for us. Apparently, he had a little too much time on his hands......
STBXW couldn't manage to find the school where S13 was playing basketball last night....then asked me to bring him to her place ASAP because of homework....then spewed all over me for not feeding him on the way home.
I will bet others on here could share some whoppers on this topic!
M42 W40 T17 M15 S13 S11 BD 7-14 A discovered 7-14 WAW moved out 10-3-14 D final 2-23-15
Journaling: I'm going to name my next thread Blindsided and Boring. No contact with H after the texts about the dr apt yesterday, and I don't even know how that resolved. Today I'll email him about D12's calendar for the upcoming weekend.
Last night after dinner I took D12 shopping for a particular style of shoes she needs for an upcoming chorus performance, and for a new outfit for her first middle-school dance on Friday. It was a good evening, but I was wiped by the end, all that walking and standing took its toll on my leg.
Just emailed H about D12's calendar for his upcoming weekend. Nothing of note, except that I asked that the trip to get the Christmas tree be just for our house and if he wanted one for his apartment to please get it when I'm not there. If he does, then I'm prepared to leave the tree lot and get my own tree another time. I don't think it will come to that.
I forgot to address Christmas plans, though. Seems like a big thing to overlook, but I did. D12 had a lot going on this weekend and I was very focused on that.
So we got Christmas plans hashed out, by email. It was what he originally proposed, I just wasn't ready to sign off on it until I saw how Thanksgiving went. We will all go to church at the service H plays on Christmas Eve, we will go to dinner afterwards. Christmas morning, he'll come over early and open presents, have Christmas dinner later. It's a Thursday, so D12 will spend the night at his place. There shouldn't be any drama around any of that.
And to those of you who say it's cake eating.....maybe it is. But I just went through this whole discussion about getting the Christmas tree. If spending Christmas Day together makes my kids happy, then so be it, I'll do it.
I don't think there is any cake eating in this - and I've read lots of stories about families who celebrate the holidays together post D.
If it makes you kids happy and your ok with it - enjoy!
Thanks, raliced. It's become so obvious to me throughout this whole process that for me, it's all about my kids. I saw that through my posts here, and IC commented on it last time. There's a high probability that if we didn't have kids I'd have filed by now. But we do, and I don't see anything wrong with trying to make their lives a little more normal, a little happier. I think it will be a nice day.
