Wife having emotional affair part 4

[Mozza]

You're right about that, she should have told them. Deduce 5 points from her account and here's your medal of Father of the Year. Now what?

Be a good dad, don't judge or try to control her. No, the kids are not going to be scarred for life because they waited a couple of days to hear the Christmas plans a month in advance. Be wary of your own tendency to say or think "It's for the good of the kids!" It looks to me like you're looking for reasons to blame her. She'll be a different parent and, heck, you want her to be at home and be a mom to your kid, so she can't be that bad. My W does a few things I don't approve of with the kids, but nothing that really puts them in danger. And I certainly do things she wouldn't approve -- I myself think I could often do better. The S does not give you the right to set the standard higher than ever. Be kind and understanding: she's going through a hard time and the reason she didn't share the Christmas plans with your kids should be fairly obvious to you: it's painful. You've explained to us how important is Christmas to her. Accept, with love, that she's going through a hard time herself and is probably avoiding the difficult parts. She doesn't have your (our) motivation to do things right.

Try to have more empathy for her. It's something you'll need in a M anyway, so this is a good time to practice.