Heather, you do not have to let Smokey have that much power in your life. Even if you get totally scr@wed over in the divorce (which will probably not happen, although my ex often said that if we both felt like we were getting scr@wed over then the settlement was probably fair - and he was right) - but even if the worst happens and you don't get what you feel is owed to you, that does NOT have the power to derail your job unless YOU let it.
I know it's hard, but you just have to let your lawyer do his work, and stay focused on YOUR life and YOUR work right now. You can do this.
