Card29 VII

[Card29]

Ss, I felt something you said yesterday, about just really needing WAS here sometimes. For you it was about your D7. For me, it was being thrown through a gauntlet of hoops with our home inspection. There was a moment yesterday where it looked like we'd actually lost this buyer, our first prospective one in 3 months on the market. I was just really down after fighting so hard, and over the previous 9 years, we would have shared the pain together, met for lunch on a workday, talked about something besides work or whatever was bothering us, etc. I exchanged some texts with her today, but they were just informative, updates. Not the same thing. Most of the time nowadays, I am truly fine on my own, but every once in a while there is still a gaping hole

I was thinking about my moment of weakness on our drive back to town on Sunday, when I half-hugged her. I think what led to it was a thought about something that happened exactly one year ago, on the same road. We were driving back from Thanksgiving at her mother's, same day of the week (Sunday after Thanksgiving). We got sleepy little D1 tucked into her car seat, night had just settled in, and the first flurries of the year started falling. We put on a Bing Crosby Christmas album, we smiled at each other, WAW curled over the console and held my hand, and we drove home. I still remembered the exit we passed when we started Bing Crosby, so when we passed it this past Sunday, it forced me into a flashback and yet another "I can't believe this last year really happened" thought. I forgot to thought-dodge, which led to the spiral.

Somehow, I didn't remember the end of that drive last year...us hitting a coyote and getting stranded 1 hour from home at 1:00 am (busted radiator)! I just remembered that as I was typing out that last paragraph lol