I would like to hear from anyone who has had even a little success in communicating with their LD/ND spouses about how to deal with the SSM in their M. I think half the battle (if you can call it that) is won if you are able to get the communication lines open at least.
I have so far had no success on this end. This is what I've tried so far all without succcess:
- talking (usually ends in heated argument) - writing (usually gets no response and writing is totally ignored) - get spouse to read SSM (no success there either) - stopped pursuing (spouse just gets more comfortable and thinks everything is ok now)
About the only thing I haven't tried is to make a move, like when I feel like a passionate kiss or some sensual touching to just go for it cos I am just so so afraid of rejection. I hope Lina or Annette (who appears to have some measure of success in communicating at least can help out here.) Should I just do it? I have run out of ideas.
About the only success I can report is that I have managed to work on myself and now:
- no longer feel resentful about the current SSM sitch (with that resentment removed H is free to be more affectionate now and I love it) - no longer feel unloved by H just because I don't feel his desire for me (he shows me in a lot of other ways)
We have no other issues. My H is a model husband and father and I have no complains about him. Love him just the way he is. Of course we bicker when we are both stressed out but we always make up before bedtime I would never leave my M over SSM or have an affair so that means I have to get this resolved by hook or by crook. I just want my lover back so badly. What happened to the man who on my birthdays used to wake me up by ML to me and took me out on trips where we would drown a whole bottle of champagne just the two of us and have a hot naughty night. I miss him sooo much. I think he went away when I got pregnant the first time and hasn't come back yet. Sorry I got sidetracked day dreaming. Hey any of you fellas out there can tell me how you felt when your wife was pregnant or afterwards when you had to go through sleepless nights dealing with a newborn? Did fatherhood and the stress of starting a family plus the financial burden get to any of you? I sure would like some insight so I can understand H better.
I would never leave my M over SSM or have an affair so that means I have to get this resolved by hook or by crook. I just want my lover back so badly. What happened to the man who on my birthdays used to wake me up by ML to me and took me out on trips where we would drown a whole bottle of champagne just the two of us and have a hot naughty night. I miss him sooo much. I think he went away when I got pregnant the first time and hasn't come back yet. Sorry I got sidetracked day dreaming. Hey any of you fellas out there can tell me how you felt when your wife was pregnant or afterwards when you had to go through sleepless nights dealing with a newborn? Did fatherhood and the stress of starting a family plus the financial burden get to any of you? I sure would like some insight so I can understand H better.
