Thank you, Cali and Mighty. I'm trying very hard to move forward. Tough chit, this is.
I came across this snippet about letting go the other day. It didn't list the author, however.
Letting Go
To let go isn't to forget, not to think about, or ignore. It doesn't leave feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret. Letting go isn't winning, and it isn't losing. It's not about pride, and it's not about how you appear, and it's not obsessing or dwelling on the past. Letting go isn't blocking memories or thinking sad thoughts, and doesn't leave emptiness, hurt, or sadness. It's not giving in or giving up. Letting go isn't about loss and it's not defeat. To let go is to cherish memories, and overcome and move on. It's having an open mind and confidence in the future. Letting go is accepting. It's learning and experiencing and growing. To let go is to be thankful for the experiences that made you laugh, made you cry, and made you grow. It's about all that you have, all that you had, and all that you will have soon again. Letting go is having the courage to accept change, and the strength to keep moving. Letting go is growing up. It's realizing that sometimes the heart can be the most potent remedy. To let go is to open a door, and to clear a path, and to set you free.
I'm having many internal "chats" with myself. Remembering that during this holiday season, all the changes in my household with my sons growing up and moving out.... That it's all ok. It is all, truly, ok.
I'm trying to let go of the life I wanted and expected, and embrace the life I have today. It is all any of us really have.
I was talking to the kids today. My oldest was talking about his father (xh) and the changes and realizations in him. The fact that he said the best thing we could do was move out of state. Xh also gave a ton of credit to H for being a great dad to them.
So my son said it's possible that H was only put into our lives for the years we had, to get where we all are today.
I agreed. Very possible.
Then D13 asked if I had known that everything would happen the way it did, would I have still done everything the same way?
Ayep. Without a doubt.
^^^^^^^ That's how they taught me, and reminded me what I am grateful for today.
