Thanks. It was impulsive. I was thinking about it. While it was tolerated it is still not what I need. I need her to want that from me, not it to be tolerated by her for my sake. I am so (lots of emphasis on so) used to being the person who takes charge and makes things move forward in our home, relationship, etc, that it becomes hard for me to let that go. She often is very passive in doing things. People ask what she want (it can be anything): "I don't know" or "I don't care. Anything is fine" are her stock answers. She is good at telling you if she doesn't want something, but being proactive in life: not so much. This is not just with me either, this is with family and friends. That is probably why I end up doing most of the stuff around the house. In light of that I get fearful that she'll never tell me what she wants and she'll drag out this holding pattern indefinitely. I know I need to let that go. Be proactive with myself. I am looking at some ACOA books to read for myself. My family has been in recovery for over 30 years, but who knows if there are some issues that are coming into play that I wasn't conscious of.
M-44 W-44 Sons- 11&14 Married- 18 Together- 27 Separation mentioned- 9-29-14 Still together, but not "together" "if you feel rotten and forgotten, remember there'll be better days."
