Xh came this morning. Since the kids were still sleeping, we had some time to talk. He told me some things about his sitch w HWW. He has been wanting out for awhile. We talked about different things, which confirmed this was actually true. He told me some things he told her about leaving, like how everything is about her & her son. His kids never matter to her. (Told me She was always mad when he would even stop here to get the kids. She didn't want him anywhere near me.) He told her he always felt like he was in trouble. She told him she would change. He said he made it very clear to her that it was over.
She called him at 2:30 in the morning saying, "I can't believe you did this to me." I said, why would she think that when she participated in it with you when you did it to me? He said, that's what I was thinking!
Ha!
Today I was looking out the window, I am pretty sure I saw her drive by. Of course, she knows he is staying at bil next door. His truck was parked in the rOAD between our houses. Must be driving her crazy.
Bil had thanksgiving at his house today. Sil had asked me yesterday to come, I said no thank you.
Xh said his mom & bro were going to come and see me. They never did. Xh was here this morn. Left to go to the store (I sent him w a list) and came back here. He helped me do stuff around the house. (Plus I painted dining too Last night!!). He had dinner here and stayed until like 10pm. I think he caught what d13 had. He wasn't feeling well this evening.
But he made some interesting comments. I told him I couldn't use the new cabinets we had gotten bc they won't fit. I was going to sell them & use the $ towards renos & use old cabinets (they aren't that bad). He said not to sell them, I can order more that will fit. I said I couldn't afford. He said just to wait.
I also said I was turning his old office into a big closet for me. The look on his face...... Haha! He said to wait on that too. I said no way.
He is getting shingles to fix the roof in addition (stupid contractor... New freaking roof... Blew off!) and is talking about helping w other things, too.
I was asking if he wanted things, like table, tv, carpet, etc. He seemed uncomfortable w that. I also told him that it was really good for me to live alone, especially since I went from living w my mom to living w him. I told him I have learned a lot about myself. I said, you should do it. It would be good for you. He looked the other way and mumbled something like, I will be soon.
We got a lot of snow tonight in a short period of time. It's really pretty. Xh was dozing on the couch. I went out & shoveled, then took the dog for a walk/run. I can take her w/o a leash, and we would do sprints. She loves it. And today is her birthday!!
D13 is the happiest little girl these days. She asked xh & I this morning, "can we get a Christmas tree today?" After xh left, she asked if he was going to go back to that nasty girl?
Ugh... The turmoil and insecurity.... But she is enjoying every second together and doesn't leave for a second! Xh & I mad comments about how she hasn't been like this, even though she is a happy, social, well-rounded kid, I hadn't noticed how much she has been a little off. I just associated it to being a 13 yr old girl. Which isn't easy. But, I forgot how she is at 10 24/7 when her 'usual' self.
S17 stayed in his room all day. He did ask if he could go out since it is his friend's last day in town. Is said no, but friend was welcome to stop over to say bye. He didn't argue, just went back upstairs. He told d13 he was going to stay in his room until he graduates so he isn't sent to boot camp or anything. Man, I hate what it came to, but I hope it was an eye opener. At least he is here & not fighting.
I have to look into getting him off these meds. I thought about it. The kind was changed a little while ago. At first he said it was better w the anxiety, but I'm wondering if there is a connection w that & his behavior. I'm gonna look into trying to stop it & maybe try something's that were recommended here on the boards.
Wonder if I will sleep tonight?
Oh yeah, xh said he would think about me all the time. He said this is really weird, but I'm going to tell you what I always thought about. He kept saying it's really weird. Then he started getting teary when he said it.
He said he would always think about me being in his truck. Eating. And happy.
Ok.
I was like, did I eat a lot in your truck?
(Still teary, but half laughing) well, like when we would work and stuff.
Xh & I owned rental properties. We flipped all of them ourselves. We worked REALLY hard. It was all on the side of our full-time jobs. We would work 15-20 hrs a day sometimes.
But, yeah, we were always happy when we did it. It was hard, hard work, and nasty sometimes. But we made it fun & laughed through most of it.
Then I guess I would pig out or something. Never knew that's what he liked about me. No wonder we are divorced. I was way off!
I hope you all are well. I know I am thankful for all of you and you support! Xo
Oh daring, that is some tough, scary stuff w s16. I'm sorry. I know how difficult it can be. I had found out of an attempt after the fact. It's heartwrenching. I hope your s I doing better now.
