Oh, I agree -- I believe that the persons whose parents are being unfair need to set the boundary, not the spouse.
But on the other hand of thinking, what if the spouse can't/won't set a boundary? Should the spouse just take it....or should they speak up for themselves?
That's something I struggled with (and admittedly still do).
She's set her own boundaries when necessary, she's just angry that she's had to do it at all. She says that she has no trouble setting boundaries with her mother. All well and good, but her mother is extremely low-pressure and easy to get along with. I love my MIL. It's safe to say that my MIL has never tested her the way my parents have tested me. Plus, she has siblings to back her up if necessary. I don't.
Part of her reasoning for leaving me is that she can remove herself from my parents. She's convinced that they hate her. I don't really think that's the case, but they're definitely not healthy to have around. She apparently thinks that to be happy in a marriage, she needs to have in-laws that love her, and that she needs to go find a new man so she can have that. She detests my parents so much that she's willing to tear up her own family to get away from them.
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
