Wife having emotional affair part 4

[3kids]

Hi friends,

Well I have had a interesting couple of days. The weekend turned out to be a bomb, every thing I tried to do with the kids blew up and didn't happen. Sad weekend to say the least. But we still had some fun. On Sunday night the youngest needed a book bag that he left in his moms car. So I asked if she could drop it off after she got off work. When she stopped she asked if she could run up and kiss the kids while they where a sleep. And I said of course. After that we started talking about Christmas and house plans. We where talking about how fast the house is going to sell now that the price has dropped. I asked what her living ideas where when the house sells. She said well I haven't decided yet. She then went into a discussion. She doesn't know what to do she is thinking about marriage counseling for us but is still unsure. She said if we tried to make it work at least we could say we tried instead of just gave up. But was unsure on how it would affect the kids if we tried. ( this is when I thought of Sandi). She started to go into how she can't afford even living at the old house and making just utilities payments, she started to look at apartments nearby but doesn't know how she could afford them. ( I didn't jump in yet). Then we started talking about Christmas and we need to split up the decorations and orniments. She looked very sad and said that this is all very hard and doesn't like doing that. I asked well what would you like to do, I told her that I loved the real tree last year so that's what I'm going to do and she can put up the fake tree if she wanted to. She brought up what about Christmas morning. I told her that it was her day so if I could get the kids that afternoon it would be great, if not they can just do presents at my house when they come back(because I get them Christmas Eve), and open Santa's presents then. She said so Santa's coming to both houses, and I said yep. She complained how she didn't have a lot of money for Christmas and I said neither do I, but we will make it the best we can for our kids. She asked well what if we have Christmas here, we could have all the presents here, I could bring mine over or what ever(I think she wants to combine gifts mom and dad). And this is when I jumped in. I said what do you want wife. I said me and the kids would love for you to come live here with us but only if you want to not because you need to. She said that is what I'm confused about right now, I just don't know. I said well maybe some time you and I should just go out and sit down have a cup of coffee and talk. We need to talk about Christmas stuff anyways. She said well maybe. We finished with some other stuff and she left.

Then came last night. She sends a text saying can I come over and bring your mail and give the kids a hug. I said sure I have to go get the oldest from basketball and the other two will be here. When I got back she was looking some stuff up on her computer that she brought over with them(odd if you where just coming to give them hugs). She stayed for a while and chit chated. Then the kids started to be really disrespectful of me testing my anger. I handed it very well where I normally would have screamed my lungs out. She didn't really say anything at all when they did this. But when the oldest jumped in on how I was disacplining the youngest and we started arguing a little(teenage boy knows it all). That's when she got up and started to leave. I asked if I could have the kids for an hour or so on Friday to get my tree since I have to work this weekend. And she said sure but she wanted to take them tubing and that night the kids where going to spend the night at her moms for the traditional BIL birthday brunch the next morning with all the grand kids. It sounded like an opening so I asked. Since you don't have the kids would you like to do something with me. She didn't answer but inadvertently changed the subject. So I took it as a no and said good night.

So it still leaves me at no clue what's going on. She brought up MC and didn't finish. Brought up Christmas and didn't finish. I know one thing I'm done asking her to do stuff. That much is clear. I also think I'm going to send a text saying I'll take the kids some other day to get the tree since she has so much stuff going on with them. She is sending mixed signals right know of wanting our family but when I ask to do stuff I get shot down. So let her be in control and shut up and do my thing.

Today's hard enough it's been one year today since my dad died and I miss him so much!

Thank you all!