Oh my gosh, ft. Thank you for the reminder. I need to go back and read that list.

I am really struggling right now. My mind and emotions are literally flip/flopping from one extreme to the other.

A few things that xh said, like she doesn't understand why I don't like her. He admitted to her texting him when we were "good". And said he didn't sleep w her until he left, but I reminded him of when I did a little research when he didn't come home one night (he talked me off at the time- one of those hindsight things). I told him it's ok, I know and I've accepted it. He admitted.

She thinks I shouldn't be mad bc we were seperated when she got pregnant. Uh... Duh... He was still my husband- just seperated and you were pursuing him LONG before that.

For Christmas last yr, I had gotten him UFC tickets & plane tickets and rented a hotel. I am never able to pull surprises off, but apparently he was preoccupied. He moved out dec 1st. But he was excited about it and said we will go. It was on jan 25. The week before texted me that he had the time off & seemed excited.


Then he got a promotion & was excited & said I would go w him on some of his travels. He went out of town right b4 our UFC trip. Texted me the day before and said he's not going and we need to proceed with our seperation and divide things up. The next day, the day when we would have left, he called and said we should have gone. Then came over and we all went to the movies & had pizza.

That's bc hww's x stayed w her on the weekends (he live ~2-3 hrs away), so xh would be around.... But SHE didn't want my husband to go with me, his wife. Same thing went down with her and our family vaca I feb. A trip we planned forever to Puerto Rico. It was booked last sept.
****hwws house w her x, which they bought 8 months prior, was listed on the market that Monday after xh & I were to go. Think there was some, "I'm selling g my house for you, you better not go!" Nonsense?!

Uh, yeah b!tch, that's why I don't like you.

Clearly, seperated or not, she had a say in MY marriage. And he let her. He admits it was wrong. For her to not get it is flabbergasting. Ok, so she will never get it.

That vent is over.

But I am going from here to there. I can't focus on anything. I can't even read others' threads, read a book, watch tv.

I just want to have a good cry, but d13 is in bed next to me still sick, the poor babe.

I've got to leave in 5 hrs for my surgery. My eyes are burning, but my brain is on high alert. This stinks.