Right. This is actually where I found my power. For months, I didn't react, engage, reach out. All the while he was softly scratching at my door.
I do think it helped move him along. My non-engagement. He was seeking something from me, even immediately after he nuked me. He was crying out, but trapped. He was confused, but I could always feel his pull. The more I didn't react or engage, I noticed that he never let up.
I need to find power in silence. Today, for example, it seemed very easy for me to reach out to him. He was literally right there when I got home. I didn't even look. I did my usual thing and walked right into the house. I never responded to the texts this morning. Tonight I didn't reach out. Then I saw I had missed a few calls and tm from him from earlier in the evening. I think about p/u d13, but she was home sick.
So he brought over a mug?
OK, and he is dealing with crazy train right now. Hormonal crazy train. And she is desperate. She left her man for this. Well, that why you don't leave your family for someone who already has one. (And again, today, she said she doesn't understand why I don't like her. OMG, was this girl spoiled to death growing up or something? WTF??)
Power in silence. Keep doing my thing. Show all of what I have accomplished this year. I just can't lose footing because I get overwhelmed or emotional.
I joke with my friends at work... "I'm falling down!" Remember the Michael Douglas movie? Falling Down? I said it years ago as a joke after a rough day. It was always a long-running joke. This brings a whole new meaning.
