About your H, he's angry but it may not be at you. That may be where he's focusing it and it's hard to hear the anger directed at you but you don't have to accept it.
You can calmly respond, "I informed you after I had a chance to digest what she was saying and find out more clearly what happened.." Then suggest that he contact the school and asked to be put on the emails that the school sends you. Take yourself out of his loop. I wouldn't validate any more than his need to know what's going on with your D but put him in charge of making sure he gets informed and it doesn't have to be by you.
Step out of the role that frustrates you.
As for your dream response, you've had a lot more work than he has, don't expect that anytime soon.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
