Please look at the underlying message Wonka is saying to you and don't get lost in the delivery.
I'll have to disagree with that. It's one thing that is stressed repeatedly around here, and Wonka did it no later than tonight. Delivery matters immensely. When helping others to change, one has to be kind. Above all, be kind. It's not just for WAS, it's equally good for LBS. We come here at a very vulnerable time. We're going to hear tough assessments of who we are, how we act and how we got here. I, like many others, am ready to hear it. There are ways however that are more effective and less distressing.
The bolded section is for you to mull over as you reflect on your past interactions with your daughters and wife.
Originally Posted By: Mozza
Originally Posted By: Wonka
I believe I've achieved one of my goals here in your thread.
Do you now see, my friend?
That being mean and critical and persistent is not helpful, even with the best intentions?
I pushed all of your buttons with criticisms because I felt that you really didn't get it and were hard-headed at times. I think you truly get it now. That yucky feeling you're experiencing at this moment is exactly what your daughters and wife felt with your constant criticisms. Imagine for a moment how your daughters and wife felt with you. Rigid. Inflexible.
Sometimes the vets here do really see things deeply & quite clearly and take on certain approaches to get the point across. You may not agree with my approach or methods. That is okay with me. The best teachers are those who push hard and make you do the tough inner work.
