still holding on - 5

[u-turn]

I feel my anger building again - I am so tired of this.
I am tired of this game that she wants to play and is obsessed with "winning". (looking back - she has done this many times in some manner - I just changed me and avoided the conflict)

I even see her now trying to win every argument with the kids and she gets angry with them when she isn't winning. I know this upsets the kids and I see them trying to make her happy.

I want to tell them to ignore her when she gets like that- I have learned to not argue - she is obsessed with winning - I have been struggling with this for almost a year and I have learned to let it go. But I also don't want to cause change in their opinion of their mother. I do not defend her to them though. I will correct them if they are being unfair.

I do not see this getting better or lasting much longer like this - unless I put myself back in the friend zone and let my feelings fester.