Heather, Do you have a will? If not, you need to get one in place to protect your assets and your children if something were to happen to you.
Dance lessons will be a good avenue for your d12 to make new friends. Does the church have activities that she could participate in?
Is it possible for you and your d12 to go to the psychotherapist together the first time? Then you could make an excuse to get up and leave after a bit and allow your d12 to see that the person isn't going to harm her.
I do hope that you and your girls can have a nice, quiet Sunday to try to relax and decompress. You've had one heck of a week on the coaster.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
